


Khada's Past: How the Demon Came to Be

by TentaChicken



Series: Bloodmoon Jhin's Tale [1]
Category: League of Legends
Genre: Also pregnancy, Also suicide, Multi, Nothing tooooo explicit but its enough for me to put it there, People die in this but they arent major, Specifically written to be the backstory for my bloodmoon jhin rp blog but whatever
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-11-29 13:40:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11442045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TentaChicken/pseuds/TentaChicken
Summary: Khada Jhin is a known ruthless killer for his mad obsession with beauty. He, to some, is a monster. But even monsters have their moments of weakness, and make mistakes. And eventually, the consequences will come and demand their payment.(How Khada Jhin became Bloodmoon Jhin, a vile demon of the Blood Moon, bent on creating art from blood and death.)





	Khada's Past: How the Demon Came to Be

 

He was Khada Jhin, the “Golden Demon”.

Khada had truly outdone himself over these past few days. The rumors of the so called “Golden Demon” were true. Yet how could they suspect a lowly stagehand?

It was perfect. No one would suspect all the gruesome displays of utter lack of human affection to be his doing. He had everything planned out, every flaw concealed, every situation planned out for. As his time in this small town grew, so did the terrified hushed whispers of the townsfolk when he would stride along the street. Khada was confident that no one suspected him.

That is, that was he had thought. 

She was beautiful. Not in the normal sense of course, as she was such of a low class and couldn't keep her beauty in prime shape. She had bruises over her body, as if she spent most of her time bumping into things. Her teeth weren’t even perfectly straight. But there was... something. Khada wasn't used to people throwing a wrench in his plans. He had planned a simple yet stunning show of a young man, a hidden talent of the village he was staying in. He was nothing spectacular, but Khada was attracted to talent. Yet as Khada aimed the gun towards the singer who was preparing for his first song, that small and frail voice had interrupted him.

"Please, mister. Do not do it." It was the girl. Something about her plea, or perhaps the shock of having been found out had made him hesitate. Khada lowered his gun from behind the curtain and turned to look at her. She had such lovely long hair, braided and tied off with a blue thread, clashing terribly with the rest of her not so well kept clothing, which suffered from fraying at the ends and stains everywhere. A fearful expression marked her face and yet something was off about her... her eyes positioned a little to the left of where he stood... ah. She was looking, yet Khada knew she could not see him.

"How did you find me?" Khada said softly. The man on stage had begun to sing, and it was far too late to finish the plan now. He placed his gun back into the holster, and directed his eye to the maiden in front of him. Her eyes were a dark brown, yet had a small hint of a strange milky quality to them. Hearing his voice, she finally looked at where he stood.

"I... I hear things. About the  _ Golden Demon _ , the beast picking off people in... awful ways." Her voice was strong, yet couldn't fully mask the fear hidden underneath it, and from her hesitation it was clear she had heard the very worst. "I heard you were in town... and I work in the inn where you stay. You probably didn't notice me, but I listen exceptionally well, and I'm well acquainted with the sound...the sound of a gun."

Khada silently cursed to himself. No wonder she looked vaguely familiar, as there had been a lowly servant at the inn. He had paid no attention; because she had been blind, and very dirty looking. Not the most pleasing image, to say the least. He hadn’t considered everything as he had thought, and all could have been ruined just because of that one oversight.

"Well then. Tell me, blind  _ girl _ -" He took a deep breath and told himself to calm his composure. "-why should I not take care of this man right over there?" Khada gestured towards the stage, which was concealed with curtains. The man had finished his first song, and had begun another, this time a softer and slower ballad. Khada had to admit; this man had quite the talent to inject such strong power into his vocals. When he returned to concentrate on the girl in front of him, he noticed she was quite reddened.

"I... I love him." She was very flustered, and began to fidget with her fingers. "I know I'm just a poor servant, but I've always admired his voice." Khada couldn't help but smile underneath his mask. "I... I was thinking of asking him a question or two after this performance."

Something about her sweet innocence tugged at Khada's heart. Love... through song. Quite admirable and poetic. The blind loving through just sound. However, he mustn’t let this cause him to falter from his mission. "You've seen too much dear, you know what I have to do now." His hand was edging back to his holster, keeping his fingers on the gun but not removing it.

"Please." The girl begged. She put her hands together, and began to shed tears from her unseeing eyes. "Give me some time. Then you can take us, both if you wish. I do not know if he even... knows I exist, after all."

Deals were something Khada didn't have very often. Since his work mostly consisted of being hidden, he never had to organize an agreement with his victims. She was so trusting though, there would be nothing lost if he merely... waited a while and took care of both of them later. "Perhaps. How much time do you need?"

She seemed genuinely startled, almost as if she didn't expect Khada to reconsider. "Let me see what happens today... then I will give you my answer tomorrow."

"It is sealed." Khada took a step towards her, and hesitated before passing her. "Tell me, what is your name?"

"Ji-an." She answered quietly. "Am I allowed to ask for yours?" 

"Not quite, dear. Good try though." He heard Ji-an sigh, and Khada couldn't help but chuckle. The singing finally came to an end, and the audience cheered and clapped, and Khada saw the man bow and began to walk towards Ji-an. "Now, it's time for you to shine." 

Ji-an seemed to shiver, as if anxious about what she planned to do. The man exited the stage and began to walk towards her. She mustered her courage and waved slightly, towards the man. The man noticed her, and smiled. "Uhm, mister!" She spoke, her voice still quavering. "Could I... talk to you for a bit?" 

"Why, of course." The man answered, and the two walked away from Khada, who was still standing in the shadows. He couldn't help but smile. This was going to be such a poetic tale, like the story of two star-crossed lovers. He loved those kinds of stories. They ended always… in tragedy.

 

* * *

 

There was soft knock at his door. Khada was barely awake, having spent most of the night lying on the itchy sheets of the inn. He also had quite a lot on his mind, and didn’t feel tired enough for sleep to take him. Pushing the sheets aside, Khada quickly slipped on a shirt and pants before making his way to the door. He opened it slowly, and was startled to find Ji-an standing there. 

“Mister, he said yes!” She seemed to be having trouble containing her excitement.

“I’m sorry… what?” Khada was yawning, tired from his lack of sleep. Ji-an giggled, and leaned in to give him a hug, which he definitely did not expect. He froze, and felt a chill crawl down his spine.

“We talked, and turns out… he has noticed me. He told me we could have lunch later today, and I wanted to tell you the good news!” She was so happy, and Khada couldn’t help but smile at her twinkling eyes. Then the thought hit him. 

“So, your answer?” He asked, and seeing Ji-an’s face change so suddenly made him almost feel guilty. She released Khada from her arms and stepped backwards, and turned her blind gaze towards the floor.

“…I didn’t think about that.” She said softly, her voice lacking the excitement from before. “I just came here to tell you the good news.”

“Ah.” She must have forgotten, and to be quite honest, Khada hadn’t been thinking too much about it either. It had lingered in his mind yesterday, but he had been preoccupied with other thoughts…

“Is it okay if you give me… enough time to have him return my feelings?” She asked, snapping Khada out of his trance. “I think… if I had someone love me, I could die happy. It’s very difficult to be attractive when you are-“ Ji-an hesitated, and sighed. “-Blind and poor. Not to mention ugly.”

Khada was about to say something, but he stopped himself. It was no business of his to become close with this woman, who he would inevitably execute. “Fine. Do you think a month would be sufficient?” He asked, thinking deeply. In a month, the traveling theater Khada was a part of  would leave the town, and depart to another location. It was enough time for him to plan out their duet, and enough to find other amusements while he waited out for grand finale. It was enough to wake him from his exhaustion, and make him shake from anticipation.

Ji-an must have heard the slight quiver in his voice, and began to shudder. Her gaze was saddened, and she nodded slowly. “I think that will be enough.”

“Good girl.” Khada said tapping her on the shoulder. He smiled when he saw that she hadn’t even flinched, as if she had heard the movement and prepared herself for it. He then slowly curled a loose lock of her hair that had fallen out of her braid. It took him a few seconds before he realized what he was doing, and Khada quickly stepped away from Ji-an, who was now wearing a rather confused expression.

“I’d prefer it if we weren’t seen together.” Khada said softly, trying to cover up the awkward moment. “Let this be the only time you seek me out first.” Ji-an nodded, and turned to leave, and he felt strange seeing her go. Odd. Very odd indeed.

It wasn’t a feeling he was very fond of. It reminded him when he was younger, naïve and blind to the cruelty of the world. Back when he let his heart open for anyone, and before he realized his calling, and the true beauty that lay within others. A  _ blissfully _ ignorant time.

He hadn’t realized he was still standing outside his door, clad only in his thin shirt and pants. Other guests started to pass by, and gave him second glances. Khada returned to his room and closed the door quickly, feeling quite embarrassed.  _ Today was no day for any performances,  _ he decided.  _ Let me just take this day off. _

After slipping on more street acceptable clothes, Khada sighed, and looked at the mask that lay on his bedside desk. Picking it up gently, he ran his finger over the edges and grooves in the detailing, lost in thought. He never felt this questioning about his definite purpose before. Setting the mask down, Khada left the room, locking the door and stowing the key in his pocket. Perhaps he could make his way to the markets, see the goods of this town. There was nothing better to do after all.

 

* * *

 

The markets of this town were filled with such glorious things. Despite being hunted by a serial killer, the merchants called out their wares with bright enthusiasm to passing people, trying to sell all sorts of things. Patterned rugs adorned with expertly braided tassels, pots and pans, perfect for boiling soup, and even good luck talismans. Khada couldn’t keep his eyes on only one stall, drinking in the atmosphere he so rarely got to enjoy.

“This talisman gives the person wearing it good fortune.” The elderly shop keeper called out to the passing people. “Luck is crucial in the pursuit of happiness!” Her eyes met his, and Khada could feel her staring into his thoughts. “You there! You look like you may be interested in one of these.”

“Ah… no thank you, ma’am.” He said politely. Khada turned to pass over to the next stall, when he heard something that made him stop walking. “Happiness sir! Good luck in anything you desire, finance, stability, and  _ love _ .” She must have seen his hesitation, and pressed on. “Yes mister, a little bit of confidence wouldn’t hurt your chances, for sure!”

With a sigh, Khada gave in. He had enough coins to spare anyway, and passed over a few of them to the elderly woman’s hand, who shook her head. “You sir, seem  _ especially _ troubled. I shall offer you a one time special discount.” She handed over the talisman and a coin back to his hand. He stammered out a thank you, and left, leaving the woman smiling gleefully.

The talisman was a soft envelope, with a neatly knotted bow on the top. Thread through the string was a small bell, in golden color that gave off a delightful jingle when shaken. There was a delicately painted flower on it, the petals painted with so much detail they looked almost looked real. Khada had to admit it was gorgeous. There were calligraphy characters on the talisman, and the text read in Ionian, “great fortune, hope for the future”.

“Such silly things.” Khada said to himself, yet he pocketed the talisman. He then made his way over to the nearby dumpling stall, and spent the rest of his coins on a good hearty lunch. He accepted his dumplings was about to dig in when someone knocked into him, and made him almost drop his platter. Khada was about to turn and glare at the person who had pushed him, but he then saw who it was.

“Ah, I apologize!” The singer he had seen yesterday said, bowing sheepishly. He was wearing a much more shabby outfit than Khada remembered. He had short hair, and such warm brown eyes... It was a shame Ji-an couldn’t see them. “I wasn’t looking where I was going… and I stumbled into you, my bad.” 

“And I’m supposed to be the one having the trouble seeing!” Said another familiar voice.  _ Right on cue _ , Khada thought to himself. It was Ji-an, who was holding the man’s hand, grinning brightly. “I do apologize for his clumsiness, mister.”

“No problem.” Khada said quietly, and Ji-an’s eyes widened, but she held her tongue.  _ Good _ . Khada thought, and the man bowed apologetically once more, and then tugged her away to another food stall. Khada continued to stare at them, until they vanished into the crowd and he could no longer see them. He picked up one of the dumplings with a pair of wooden chopsticks and began to eat, deep in thought. Yes, he had a plan.

They weren’t too difficult to find. They were holding hands, swinging them gaily as they made their way to a more secluded part of town, an area closer to the quiet forest next to a small river. They sat together on a fallen log, their hands still together, giggling like teenage lovers. It was a sickening sight, yet, something about it calmed the small fire burning away in his insides, something Khada hadn’t felt in some time.  _ What was it called…? _

“Oh Hansuke, it is a very nice day out.” Ji-an said quietly, snuggling onto the man’s shoulder. “I feel very lucky.”

The man, who Khada assumed was Hansuke, let out a hearty laugh. “Trust me, I am the lucky one. You are such a beautiful person, Ji-an, both inside and outside.” Khada watched as Ji-an blushed, and hid her face in her hands. It was as if the words had been taken right from his mouth.

“You don’t realize how blessed I am to have you come forward to me. You have such gorgeous eyes; they have such a loving, kind twinkle in them. They are the same color as mine, brown. But yours have such nice warmth to them… I feel like I would get lost to it.”

Khada blinked. He hadn’t realized he was touching his own eye as they talked, thinking about their blue coldness, rather icy than warm. For once, he was relieved they couldn’t see him. In his distracted state, Khada didn’t realize he had stepped on a twig, and he looked up to see Ji-an stare directly at where he stood, putting a finger to her lips.

“Someone is here.” She whispered softly. Hansuke turned, and saw Khada, who was frozen like a deer about to be hunted. He saw Hansuke stand up, and there was no other option.

“Ji-an, it’s me.” Khada said, announcing his presence. Hansuke stopped his approach and blinked.

“Do you know this man?” Hansuke turned to ask his lover, and Ji-an seemed surprised. She nodded, and he gave a soft sigh. “Ji-an, who is he?”

“Well…” Ji-an hesitated. Khada cursed himself; this was such a stupid situation he had gotten himself into. Hansuke was of a moderately apt build, and currently Khada was unarmed, and could not take on this man. “He’s a friend of mine.” Ji-an finally said, and Khada gave a sigh of relief as Hansuke’s expression was from caution to more of confusion.

“Strange friend, to sneak up on us like that.” Narrowing his eyes, he returned to his spot next to Ji-an.

“I’m more of her accomplice, if you know what I mean.” Khada said, and he told himself it was technically true. “I helped her... begin talking to you.”

Hansuke’s eyes widened. “Oh? Well, then I cannot have ill will towards you, friend.” He smiled, and held out his hand, and Khada took it, his hand very warm like his demeanor. “Who knew I would accidentally stumble into a friend of yours, Ji-an. No wonder you were so silent after he spoke! He was making sure nothing went wrong, correct?”

“Yes.” Khada answered before Ji-an got the chance to speak. “That was exactly what I was doing.” He cleared his throat, signaling for Ji-an to stay quiet. 

“I see.” Hansuke grinned. “May I ask for your name?”

Khada didn’t say anything. This was one situation he couldn’t worm his way out of, and he was too rustled to remember any of his other aliases. There was no alternate option, and Hansuke was waiting for an answer. “Khada.” He answered, noticing Ji-an listening intently.  _ They will be gone by the month,  _ he thought to himself.  _ Quit your worrying _ .

“Nice to meet you, Khada. My name is Hansuke, as you may have guessed. I am a food merchant that resides in the village, and a part time performer on the stage.” He seemed to be a little sheepish as he said that. “I’m not the best vocalist, but I’d love to get some actual training someday.”

“I’ve heard your performances. I can say I thoroughly enjoyed them.” Khada couldn’t help but admit. When it came to art, he had to give credit where it was due. This made Hansuke smile in a flustered manner, which looked quite cute on him.  _ What? _ Khada thought to himself.  _ What am I saying? _

“Ah. But I really should leave you two be. Nice to meet you, Hansuke. I’ll see you later, Ji-an.” Khada turned to leave, and he heard both of them say their goodbyes.

“It was nice meeting you.” 

“Later, Khada!” 

“Likewise.” Khada left, and wandered the streets for several more hours. It was growing dark, and despite his fondness for the streets lined with lanterns, he did feel very exhausted.  _ Who knew a simple human interaction would tire him so much?  _ He made his way back to his room in the inn. Upon entering, he noticed his floor had been swept, and that his sheets have been changed already, despite him specifically requesting no one to enter his room.  _ Damn that Ji-an. _ He cursed himself. He should have at least hidden away his things before leaving. 

He then saw that his mask was gone from the bedside table. 

Fear coursed through his veins, stinging like bites from vipers. The chill he felt was downright freezing, and he walked briskly towards the table, checking to see if it had fallen or he had misplaced it. He found nothing, nothing but a small note, written in a very messy script, barely readable. He could make out a few words however, which were “under the bed”.

Dropping to his knees, Khada reached under the bed and found a small box. Without hesitation, he nearly ripped it open, and inside was all his belongings, his outfit neatly folded away, and his two pieces of his gun tucked underneath. Everything else was there, but Khada found something he didn’t own. 

It was a smaller box, pink and very pretty. Having calmed down from his initial shock, he opened it and found four neatly wrapped umeboshi. It had been a long time since he had pickled plums, and he had remembered not being too fond of them. He carefully unwrapped one, and sniffed. It had a sharp scent, but nothing that seemed poisonous. The plum was sticky, and Khada felt odd. He took a small bite, and swallowed. Not bad.

Before long he had finished all of the plums. He delicately licked the sticky saltiness off the tips of his fingers, and then returned the box back underneath the bed. Perhaps he could later thank Ji-an for them, that is, if they weren’t actually deadly.

Khada let out a grimace.  _ What was happening to him? _ If he did keep this up, he would be a failure, another lost to the sickening pulls of  _ emotion _ that clouded one's head. He shook his head.  _ No.  _ He thought firmly.  _ This is going to be the last time. _

He pulled out the box again, and removed his guns and mask. Placing them on the bedside table, Khada was determined.  _ Tomorrow. _ He promised himself.  _ Get something done. Anything. To prove you haven’t lost your composure. _ That was a good idea.

Getting ready for bed, he washed his face and brushed his teeth, unable to meet his eyes in the mirror. Khada had usually spent long hours gazing at his own appearance in reflections, and would admire its magnificence. It felt very strange to go to bed without accomplishing his daily quota of narcissism.

_ Tomorrow _ . Khada promised, closing his eyes.  _ Tomorrow will be a new day. _

 

* * *

 

He had lied.

Khada hadn’t taken his gun or his mask outside during his daily outings. He would walk down the streets, absorbing the bustling atmosphere, with no particular goal in mind. Every now and then, he would find Ji-an and Hansuke together, and they would greet him warmly, and take him out for a treat. Every time it happened, it weighed him down, as if enjoying the simple pleasures was worthy of guilt.

Truthfully, it was. Khada had to remind himself, he didn’t have much time left. It had already fallen on the final week of the month, and he simply could not understand. Hansuke didn’t know anything, so his cheerful nature whenever he laid his eyes on Khada was reasonable. But surely,  _ surely _ Ji-an would show some more nervousness? Some more… fear? Yet she stayed her normal upbeat attitude, and it had wormed itself through Khada’s heart, like a parasite.

He had thought about it many times. If Hansuke hadn’t been there, and he was to take his place, would he be happier? Every time he asked himself this, Khada had defiantly told himself no.  _ Art brings me happiness _ ,  _ not a fool’s love _ . And yet, it didn’t stop the questioning to continue, and the doubt to finally overtake him.

_ Four days until _ . He had an idea.

_ Three days _ . But was it the right way to go?

_ Two. _ Khada had made up his mind. 

_ One. _

Khada began packing his stuff into his suitcase. He wouldn’t need it anymore. With a heavy sigh, he closed the lid, and set it besides the bed. It was time to pay Ji-an a visit.

He walked out of his room, and made his way to the maid’s quarters. He gently rapped his knuckles on the door, and awaited a response. The door opened slowly, and Ji-an stuck her head out, glancing about. “Yes?”

“Hello Ji-an. It’s me.” Her face visibly paled, and Khada felt uncomfortable. “I wish to talk to you, may I come in?”

“Y-yes, Khada.” She opened the door and gestured for Khada to enter, and he did. The maid’s quarters was basically a smaller version of his room, and had only one bed. Come to think of it, he hadn’t seen anyone else cleaning the rooms during his stay at the inn. “What exactly…” Her voice trailed off, and Khada sat himself on the chair, tapping the armrest out of anxiousness. “What do you need to talk about?”

“Ji-an, I’m going to leave town tomorrow, with my troupe.”

“Yes, I know that.” She sighed, and sat herself on the bed. “I’ve been dreading it, but I’ve tried to not show it.”

“You did a good job, fooling even me, dear.”

Ji-an smiled, her eyes seemingly brimming with tears. “I… I had a good month with him you know, and not to mention with you as well. I’m very happy, Khada.”

“Likewise.”

She was weeping now, and her tears dripping onto her front. “What do you have planned, Khada? Or is it... a surprise?”

“I’m not going to perform, Ji-an.”

His words felt like daggers in his throat, cutting deeply. Ji-an looked up at him, startled. She seemed to be unsure of what to say, and her lip quivered. “What… do you mean?”

Khada stood up. “I wanted to tell you farewell, Ji-an. I wanted to tell you that, before I leave. I’m not going to hurt you, or Hansuke.” He swallowed, every word feeling like another stab in his chest. “I’m setting you free.”

Ji-an stood up from the bed, and wobbled, as if the news had intoxicated her with happiness. She leaned towards him and tightly embraced him, sobbing into his shirt. Khada didn’t even say anything, and merely let her sob onto him, enjoying the warmth for the last time, perhaps.

“Why the mercy, suddenly?” Ji-an asked. “I’ve heard tales,  _ gruesome _ and absolutely  _ terrifying _ acts, and yet you falter here?” She wiped her tears with her sleeve. “What has gotten into you, Khada?”

“I…” He could not finish his sentence. It hurt to even think about, how was he to say it out loud, in front of her? Khada’s heart had betrayed him, and now was throbbing achingly. To his further surprise, Ji-an softly stroked the front of his chest.

“I hear it, Khada. Do you have something you need to share with me?”

“No.” He said, forcing his voice into a flat tone. It failed, as Ji-an chuckled through her tears, smiling up at him.

“My, you are so flustered, even I can hear it.” There was a moment of silence, as if Ji-an had realized what she just said. “Khada… why are you flustered?”

Khada said nothing, and Ji-an looked up at him, her eyes filled with… sympathy. He couldn’t help but turn away. “Oh Khada. I hadn’t realized you… felt that way.”

“No, I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

She gently placed her hand on his thigh, and Khada shuddered involuntarily. Ji-an couldn’t help but smile. He couldn’t meet her eyes, despite knowing she was blind. “I didn’t know you felt that way about me. Is that… is that why?”

Khada didn’t answer. Ji-an laid her head on his lap, and he felt his body heating up. “If so, why didn’t you simply… get rid of Hansuke?”

There was a long stretch of silence. Khada had asked himself the same question, day after day, and finally, couldn’t avoid the truth to the matter. “It would have upset you. And, to be quite honest, he is a good man.” Ji-an smiled when he said this, and snuggled deeper into his lap.

“So… You will be leaving tomorrow?”

“Yes, Ji-an. I will most likely not be returning here anytime soon.” Khada felt forlorn, and gently lifted her head off of his lap as he stood up, causing Ji-an to step backwards, and sit on the bed once more. “I should go and continue packing.” He said, despite the fact he had already finished packing. Khada needed an excuse to get him away from feeling so… somber.

“Wait.” Ji-an seemed to be deep in thought; her robe seemed to be slipping off one side of her shoulder. Khada couldn’t keep his eyes off of the sight, and felt deeply bothered with what he felt… and what he was thinking of. She slowly reached for her robe and began to loosen it.

Khada felt terror, his mind shrieking as the fire in his heart burned. “What are you  _ doing _ ?” He hissed, his hands beginning to shake. Ji-an smiled coyly, and teasingly paused her act.

“I mean… you do like me very much, don’t you?”

“I… I cannot deny that.” Khada was well aware of the sweat, making his clothes feel rather sticky. “But you can’t do this, you are so happy with Hansuke.”

Ji-an laughed. “I have already done it with him, and… perhaps see this is as a thank you, a repayment of a favor, or a goodbye present.” She continued to undress herself, and Khada could not keep his eyes off her nude body. “I do appreciate you very much, Khada. Hansuke is grateful for you as well.”

“Just once.” Khada said softly. “You’ve coerced me into this, you sly girl.” He reached and gently stroked her soft curves, something he had  _ dreamed _ of doing one day. “You know, Hansuke must have already told you, but you are beautiful, Ji-an.” He swallowed thickly, and looked back at Ji-an, who was a shade of deep scarlet. She nodded, too embarrassed to react. Khada mustered up his courage, and then began to slip down his own pants, and joined Ji-an on the bed.

Khada couldn’t recall what happened after that. He just knew that it was possibly the most fulfilling experience he had ever had, and hadn’t regretted it at all. He lay in the bed, holding Ji-an in his arms as she slept, exhausted from the ordeal. Khada smiled sleepily, and gave a satisfied sigh.  _ It was truly a good way to end such a troublesome time, _ he thought to himself. He wasn’t a truly changed man, yet there was a small spark of something. It was deeply embedded in him, and refused to let go.

 

* * *

 

He stood facing the caravan, helping the others pack up the theater equipment. Khada had already said farewell to Ji-an in the morning, and hoped to get out of the town as soon as possible. He had heard from the troupe leader that they may return to the town in less than a year, and with a pang of regret wished he could have told Ji-an.  _ Oh well _ .

It was nearly time to depart. A small crowd of villagers had appeared in front of the caravan, preparing to say their farewells to the performers and staff. Khada gazed around the crowd for any familiar faces, and found the elderly woman who had sold him the talisman. She seemed to have a knowing glint in her eye, and she nodded, as if she was encouraging him. Khada put his hand in his pocket, and felt the talisman still there. Scanning the crowd once more, he saw Ji-an near the back, trying to push herself through the crowd but unable to.

Without hesitation, Khada leaped down from the caravan and quickly made his away around the crowd to the back. Finally, he located Ji-an and grabbed her hand, which startled her. “It’s me.” He said, and her face relaxed into a smile. “I wanted to give you something…” Khada placed the talisman into her hand, and folded her fingers over it. “I want you to have it.”

“What is it?” Ji-an asked, gently feeling the small talisman with her fingers. 

“It’s a good luck charm.” Khada answered. “It will give you good luck while I’m gone, and until I come back.”

There was a hand on his shoulder, and Khada jumped, and relaxed once he realized it was Hansuke. “You’re going to come back to us? When will that be? We will have to have some welcome back special… nothing too big, but good enough.” He added, waving his hands. His words greatly touched Khada, and he couldn’t help but smile, wider than he had in years.

“In around eight to ten months, perhaps? The leader wasn’t too sure but I’m sure you will know when we are going to come to town.” Khada nodded, and gently patted Ji-an’s hand, and shook Hansuke’s. “Good luck you two…”

“Thank you for everything, Khada.” Hansuke smiled, and Ji-an nodded, tears glistening in her eyes.

“Yes, thank you so much.”

When Khada was back on the caravan, he could feel a small tear about to drip from his eye. He caught it before anyone else could see, but it was enough to surprise him. He hadn’t cried in years, after all. Those two people were truly special, and Khada no longer felt any guilt embracing the fact that he cared deeply for them both.

With a hearty sigh, he glanced at the suitcase that lay at his feet. He had promised himself, that he would continue his purpose. Now that he would be away from them both, Khada could continue with his secret performances. That’s what he told himself, as Khada leaned back and prepared himself for the long ride to the next town to perform in.

The months had passed by fairly quickly. While it was true that Khada didn’t perform as much as he used to, he seemed to have changed in his style. He spent more time observing his victims, learning about their habits, quirks, and then incorporating them into the finale. But he was cautious as well. He didn’t let himself have any room for mistakes. As much as he had enjoyed his time at the last village, it was truly a disaster, and he didn’t want to have another… Ji-an and Hansuke to deal with. 

His plan worked, and soon the towns and villages were swarmed with terror and fear again. As much as he enjoyed this, Khada’s mind constantly wandered back to the bustling, excited crowds in that one village, the one he looked forward to returning soon. It was always in the back of his mind, and never seemed to want to leave. However, as the months passed, the thoughts began to become more powerful until he could not ignore them anymore.

Soon enough though, it was time to return.

It was widely known that the performing theatre was to come soon, Khada made sure of it. In a week, the troupe theater would be returning to the town where Ji-an and Hansuke would be waiting. The caravan was close, within walking distance to the town. Khada had started to sneak out at night; just to visit the town when it was at it’s darkest. He was always wary of getting caught, so he made sure to carry around his guns, strapped to his waist like an accessory or a cane. He then could walk the streets, keeping an eye out for their familiar faces, while also enjoying the nighttime view and the familiar streets he had spent his happiest days in recent memory. 

One day, on a particularly cool night, Khada walked to the town and wandered the streets, with no plan in particular. The moon above shone, signaling a full moon soon. Sometimes, he would visit old spots where he would hang out with his friends, other days he would go in search for some nighttime snacks. Today seemed like a good enough day to just simply enjoy the cool night air. That was, until a shrill shriek shattered the silence.

Khada turned, and tried to find the source of the noise. It was coming from the other side of town; where the inn he had stayed in lay. Feeling an instinctive feeling of dread in his gut, Khada began to sprint, begging nothing bad has happened… nothing terrible… 

Please.  _ Please. _

_ Not like this. _

 

* * *

 

Huffing and breathing heavily, Khada placed his hands on his knees, exhausted from the run. He looked upwards, and found himself in front of the inn. People there were already walking into the building, as if they had heard the sound too.

Khada was fearing the worst. He was in a daze. He didn’t remember making his way to the maid’s quarters, but there was a small crowd before the door. He shoved them aside, and stumbled into the familiar room, and saw something that shook him to the core, not for the reasons one may have expected.

_ Her.  _

Ji-an lay on the bed, the sheets blood stained and her arm hanging to the side, pale and lifeless. Her stomach seemed to have been cut open, and several people surrounded the bed, including… Hansuke. He looked up, his eyes filled with pain that Khada would have never wished to ever see again.

“Khada…?”

“I…I came early.” His words interrupted with gasps for air, still tired from the frantic run. “What happened…?”

Hansuke was still weeping, but managed to wipe away the tears to speak. “She… she was carrying a child. Yet something went wrong and-“ He choked on his tears, and couldn’t continue. Khada stepped towards the bed and tried not to look towards the body… that lay so still, so devoid of warmth. Her eyes gazed off into the corner of the room, her mouth slightly agape. He had seen countless lifeless bodies before, yet nothing… nothing had ever made him feel like how he felt now. The shock had managed to keep his eyes dry, as if no amount of tears could make him forget the scene.

“Hansuke, the child still lives.” Another person, holding a very bloody bundle said softly. Hansuke paused his weeping, and stretched his arms out, ready to accept the child. It was whimpering softly, and Khada saw as the expression on his Hansuke’s face softened, as he lay eyes on his child. He returned his eyes to the bed, unable to look away.

“He is beautiful.” Hansuke caressed the child gently with his gentle fingertips, his voice starting to calm down. “Khada… do you want to know what we decided to name him?”

“What?” Khada breathed, barely paying attention. 

“Kano. It means flower, and Ji-an agreed it would be perfect.” Khada stopped and turned to stare at Hansuke. “She loved the flower you gave her.”

“Did you tell…?” 

Hansuke nodded, smiling weakly. “Yes. I did. I told her what it said as well.” He then turned his attention towards the child and began to coo. “Such a darling child, don’t you agree?” 

Khada was about to walk towards Hansuke when he saw something flash in his eyes before him. The man in front of him seemed to stumble backwards, and begin shaking. Another had to take the child from him, as he seemed to be on the edge of dropping the bundle. Everyone crowded around him, and began fussing, and Khada stepped forward to ask what was wrong when Hansuke looked at him. The look was...it was one he would never forget.

He had never seen such pain, and anger directed at him. Distraught, confusion, and pained tears. It was amplified tenfold, seeing it from someone Khada had now considered as a.. friend. Hansuke seemed unstable, clearly fearful of something.  _ What happened?  _ Khada couldn’t help but step back, and Hansuke’s eyes fluttered and he collapsed onto the floor, causing everyone to rise up to help him immediately. Khada couldn’t shake off the feeling something was absolutely wrong, and he took a step backwards. Making sure no one saw him, he turned and ran.

The people had all rushed inside to help the collapsed Hansuke. Khada on the other hand, was outside sitting at the steps head in hands. He needed to relax. The vision of Ji-an on the bed was ingrained into his mind, as if branded with a fiery hot iron rod on his eyes. Even when he closed them… he could see the blood dripping onto the floor, reminding him that she was gone. Gone forever.

The sounds of the outside world had diminished to a soft hum. All Khada could hear was the agonized throbbing in his chest, and the pain that wouldn’t let go. It was as if sleep would never come, but when it did, Khada was grateful for anything to numb the ache in his heart.

 

* * *

 

“Khada?”

Khada was being shaken awake, and it took him a while to realize what had happened. He had fallen asleep on the stairs and groggily picked his head up. Hansuke was gently shaking him, his face looking worse than yesterday.  _ Oh dear _ .

“Ah… Hansuke.”

Khada noticed the pained smile Hansuke gave him, and the memories of what had happened last night came flooding back. “What is it?”

“I need...I need to talk to you, Khada.” His voice was very soft, very strained as if he had been using it for too long. “Let’s go to the-” He hesitated. “-The river.”

Khada nodded, and followed Hansuke to the place. It hadn’t changed since the last time he had been there, however there was a more somber mood to the place, as one of the usual people who would accompany them was missing. Khada sat down on the log, and Hansuke sat down next to him, unable to meet his eye.

“So. She wanted me to give you… this.” Hansuke pulled out from his pocket a small object, and Khada immediately recognized it. Taking it in his fingers, he looked upon the familiar painted flower and carefully knotted bow. Hansuke continued, his voice still fragile, “She said that it helped, and she thanked you for it.”

“I just wish I was here earlier.” Khada said quietly, looking at the talisman lost in thought. He didn’t notice Hansuke’s odd smile. 

“I don’t blame you, Khada.” Hansuke said quietly. “Nothing… was your fault.”

Khada looked up in confusion at Hansuke’s odd smile.  _ His fault _ ? He didn’t press the matter further, and decided to drop his question. The smile bugged him. It seemed as if Hansuke was at peace.  _ Very… odd. _

“How is the child…?”

Hansuke seemed to stiffen. “He is doing fine.”

“Shouldn’t you be with him?”

Hansuke shook his head. “I have others watching over him.” He stood up and smiled again, giving Khada the chills. “He will be fine.” There was a long stretch of awkward silence, and Hansuke looked away. Khada was confused.  _ Why leave his child? Shouldn’t he be with him, as a father? Especially as the child no longer had a… _

“I… I think it’s time to say goodbye.”

Khada blinked. The abrupt request to leave was surprising. Something about the way Hansuke had said it, the expression Hansuke had, and especially that smile…

Something terrible was to happen.

“Good bye.” Khada replied, still looking deep into Hansuke’s eyes. The pain was deeply ingrained in the formerly warm gaze, giving it an almost… apathetic look. The second he finished his words however, Khada knew he had made a mistake.

Hansuke nodded, and calmly, almost too calmly, walked towards the edge of the river. With a deep sigh, Khada watched motionlessly as Hansuke walked right into the river, and plunged into it’s fast roaring streams.

“Hansuke!” Khada yelled, standing up and running towards the edge. It was too late. The river had already taken him, and Khada could only see the bobbing of his head for a moment before the river finally washed over him and took him down under. He ran along the bank, trying to see if he could find him, but to no avail. 

It had been hours. He was walking along the bank and finally reached the end, a long waterfall into a lake. It was impossible for anyone to survive that fall, and Khada felt empty inside. The night had fallen, and the moon shone, a deep and dark shade of red. It was the Blood Moon, and it was rising. Khada knew of the cult that worshipped the moon, and the tales it and magic it contained. His mind was whirling with despair as he walked back to the log where he had sat with Hansuke for the last time, and spotted the talisman, where he had dropped with when Hansuke… left. He picked it up, and stared, thoughts racing through his head.

Khada didn’t know what to do. His love, gone. His friend, gone as well. What had made him so angry? Perhaps did… did Ji-an tell him of who he really was? Khada shuddered. That would explain quite a lot, the fear and hatred in his eyes. He had been so devastated, that he… took his own life. Khada wept quietly at the edge of the water, the moon rising higher and higher above him.

The deep sadness. This  _ crippling _ guilt. Khada felt he could never,  _ never _ harm another again. What was he, without his art, his work? If another act left him devastated like this… Khada was certain he wouldn’t be able to take it. His heart felt like it was being constricted by a vile serpent, keen on wanting it to cease its frantic beating, its venomous fangs mere millimeters away from puncturing it. He wanted the aching pain to end. 

Yet, he did not want to end up like Hansuke, his body floating in the lake. Nothing,  _ nothing _ could be worse than that.

Khada had a strange idea. If he could forget, then everything could start anew. If he didn’t remember, then everything would be like as it was, before he walked into this town. He gazed up at the Blood Moon, and knew what he would do.

He pulled out his guns. He snapped them together, and used a special compartment on the larger piece that allowed a large brush tip to be expelled from the end. With this, it transformed the whole gun into a large paintbrush, resembling ones used in calligraphy. With a sharp stone he found on the ground, Khada bit his lip and swiftly sliced open his hand, grimacing as the blood splattered on the ground.  _ It will be over soon. _ He thought, feeling slightly light headed. He gripped the brush and carefully coated the tip with the blood, and began to paint.

When Khada was finished, the sigil of the Blood Moon shone on the ground, a deep dark red, still glistening, sparkling from the fresh ink. He then held his hands together and prayed, softly whispering his prayer into the dark of the night. He knew he had succeeded when he felt a breeze blow, ruffling his hair.

_ “Why do you seek us, mortal?” _ A dark voice spoke, akin to chattering chains of hundreds of wailing ghosts shrieking in unison.

“I wish for a favor, spirits of the Blood Moon.” Khada whispered, his wounded hand still shaking.

_ “Ask, and we shall give, foolish mortal. But be warned, every action has a determined consequence.” _

“I wish to forget, spirits.” Khada coughed, his insides feeling cold, his lightheadedness getting worse. “I wish to erase this pain that resides deep within me.”

There was an abundance of chuckling from the spirits. Khada was now seeing a circle of foggy figures, surrounding him, all adorned with white and red masks.  _ “Be careful what you wish for, mortal.” _ A different voice spoke.  _ “What is done cannot be reverted.” _

“I am certain!” Khada said loudly, his strength dwindling. “Please, just take it away. I do not wish to die, but I wish to forget.”

_ “Then it is sealed.” _

The spirits were cackling, and the moon seemed to shine brightly, nearly blinding Khada. There was a sudden rush, and the fog seemed to swarm all over him, engulfing him in the screams… screams of innocents. It was as if every crime he had committed was coming back to haunt him, even if he did not remember it. He opened one eye, and saw ghosts from his past. A maid, two lovers eyes filled with hate, an elderly man, a preacher… too many to count.

Finally, the ordeal was over. Khada lay on his fours, coughing and hacking furiously. His mind was exhausted, but thankfully, it seemed as if he didn’t even remember what he was doing there.

Before he could even give a sigh of relief, a shattering pain struck his hands. Khada hissed and grabbed his arm, only for it to seem to turn red before his eyes. Shaking, Khada realized his arms were slowly being intertwined with corruption, bursting forth from underneath his flesh. He howled from the pain, his fingers turning into twisted claws and his body slowly changing colour to that of a harsh purple bruise. 

Everything hurt. His face felt like it was tearing itself apart, his teeth being ripped from their sockets. Khada dug his newly formed claws into the bloodstained ground, and found himself panting, as if he were some feral beast. His bones seem to be piercing his muscles, his tissue warping and melting into a new, unfamiliar shape. His heart seemed to be beating out of his chest, faster and faster... until it finally stopped beating altogether. It was still.

_ “Fool. You think we do not know who you are? You are a monster, mortal, and do not deserve any pity for your atrocities. Even we are disgusted by your crimes. We have given you the cleansing of mind you desired, but it came with a price. The beauty you treasured within yourself, now matches your insides, you hideous beast.” _

The ghostly fog cleared, and Khada regained control of his limbs. He struggled to lift himself, and found that his clothes were constraining him. Snarling, he tore them with his claws, and took a deep breath as he could finally breathe freely. The mist had fully abandoned him, and he looked around if he could find something to wash the filth, the blood and sweat, off of him. He spotted the river and crawled over, leaving deep gashes in the dirt with his disgusting claws. When Khada looked into the water, he recoiled immediately.

The memories of his past had been erased yes, but Khada knew he had beauty. This… this was not beauty. His eyes were lights in a nearly pure dark body, his face twisted and gnarled. One eye was blue, like his normal eye, but one was red, glowing with a sinister aura. His mouth, Khada noticed, had long curved fangs, teeth of a wretched beast, not of a refined man like him. It was revolting. It utterly disgusted him. 

“What did you do to me?” Khada snarled, trying to find the mist that had cursed him, yet to no avail. “You will pay!” He stood up, and roared at the Blood Moon, which was still shining it’s cursed light upon him.

He had no memories of anything prior. From what he was aware, he had done absolutely nothing wrong. Why was he cursed to be a monstrous creature? The mist was wrong. This was uncalled for. Khada didn’t even notice his claws were digging into his own skin leaving lines of bright magenta blood where he dug in too deep. His anger was too great for him to feel it.

“Fine.” Khada said out loud. “Fine! You turn me into a beast, I will become a beast. Do you want to know the true meaning of beauty? Mark my words. I will plague this land with terror and fear, and they will all bend,  _ kneel _ before me. You do not know what you’ve just created.”

Khada- no. That name did not fit him anymore. Jhin, now a fully realized demon, picked up his gun and separated it into two pieces. He would need a new plan now, a new persona. He picked up his clothes and a mask fell out from one of the pockets, a refined face truly beautiful. But it did not suit him. He crushed the mask with one swift blow from his foot, and smiled as it crumbled beneath him. Something more… vile and demonic would do.

Jhin, now filled with the wrath of the Blood Moon, hunted people for art. They would become his canvas, their blood spilled to become ink for his brushwork. With every bullet fired from his gun, he could feel the satisfaction and sheer delight of the pain he caused, the beauty he made. Yes, this was indeed his true calling. He did not need anything else. It took years, but Jhin finally admitted it.

“Thank you spirits. You’ve freed me and allowed me to become who I truly am, a demon both inside and outside.” Jhin was grinning. With the centuries to come, he would keep going; his drive for art and need for blood undying. As time went on, he lost himself, even more than before, and could barely recall a time before he was a wretched demon of the dark. It suited him however, as he did not need to know the past. All that mattered was the present, and the future.

_ Thank you. _

 


End file.
